10 thoughts on “Ask your soul doctor

  1. Finished up Maehoffer Jr.’s college admission applications last week. They are schools you’ve never heard of – $80K and 5yrs for a fishing license.

    He’ll still need all the help he can get. So I stapled a photo of Todd Bridges on the cover letter and dribbled some grape pop on the envelope. I just want the fucker out of the house; he can deal with the shitbags in administration after I drop him off on campus.

    Way I figure, we’re all oppressed, we’re all Dolezal.

    1. Pretending to be African American is so last year. Trust me on this one, my kids (grammar) school recently hired a diversity officer — an illiterate wetback married to an Asian Jew lesbian. (I wish I was making this up.)

      My kids will go to whatever college I want them to attend. I have already drafted the essays. The poor children are transgender Muslim converts that grew up in an Orthodox Jewish household run by an evil rich bigot. My son is going to shit when I tell him he has to wear a hijab and falsies to his Harvard interview.

      Fuck these clowns. If they want to make the game about dishonesty and identity politics, the Taint family will take it to the next level. We play to win.

      1. the fuckers have the temerity to think that we’ll play nice?

        We crush 80hr workweeks, juggling booze, wives, girlfriends, and narcotics, stopping only to leap frog and fist-fuck Asians and Hindis who beg for five minutes in our sandbox. We don’t stand in line, we don’t wait our turn, and we damn well don’t share. But we play by the rules.

        If Obama wants to re-write the top of the monopoly box, and go from a meritocracy based on supply and demand governed by law, to some commie turd soup dreamed up in a Berkley Hookah bar, I say bring it on. It’s a hell of a lot easier to bribe, lie and steal than to work.

  2. Jack. After reading that I got a tear in my eye…then I realized that I was sitting on balls.
    Regardless, well done.

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